Battleship: Movie Review

The infamous "Battleship" finally arrives in our shores. Infamous because its probably one of the weirdest film adaptations we have heard off. A board game that has no story or whatsoever - it's more or less a sign that Hollywood is seriously running out of ideas. We are not even going to comment if it has any connection with the game because obviously it does not. But at the end of the day, who are we to judge? "Battleship" may have had a bad start but it may just salvage itself by actually being good right? Wrong actually. While the film is truly enjoyable on an entertainment-only mindset, it is as dumb a plot as its namesake. Be prepared for mind-numbing plot holes, über-patriotic scenes and a mish-mash of nonsense the whole first half.

Humans have discovered a planet that is identical to the Earth. The scientists decide to send out a message to the planet in the hopes that they get a response from its possible inhabitants. A few years pass, in the Hawaiian Islands, 14 nations are conducting war exercises when 5 objects come down from space. They soon discover that these objects are actually a fleet of ships containing hostile intelligent life. Now, Lt. Alex Hopper (Taylor Kitsch) and his crew must find out how to stop the aliens, who has superior weapons and technology, from taking over the whole human race.

If there's one thing that's truly memorable about "Battleship" is its awesome visuals and its mind-numbing brainlessness. It's actually an in-your-face film which works on both ends of the spectrum. On one hand, the movie is really entertaining and at times even feels very light and funny. But on the other hand, for a scifi film, it's just too simple that it leaves lots of what-the-heck moments where in things just don't make any sense (like the decision to use an old battleship that was turned into a floating museum already but had guns working and almost unlimited ammo). The story actually had potential - we liked the overall plot and why the aliens where going for a certain area in Hawaii but its all muddled-up with unnecessary scenes on patriotism or just plain nonsense (the first half was the biggest culprit). The acting left us wanting more as it turned out a little bit stale. Finally, there's a long scene where there is an ode to the actual Battleship game. Amazingly, it turned out okay. Overall, "Battleship" will be good enough if you don't mind not thinking at all for its 2 hour running time.

Rating: 2 and a half reels





Why you should watch it:
- the film has a lot of action-packed scenes in the second half
- the effects were truly outstanding

Why you shouldn't watch it:
- the film has huge plot holes and scenes that do not make any sense
- another one of those films that is just too patriotic that it affects how the story goes